I asked my friend Nikki George to share from her heart as my first guest blogger ever on the Light and the Glory! She is an awesome gal that loves Jesus and her family with a passion. She is a married, stay at home, homeschooling mother-of-four who desires nothing more but to hear the Lord’s heart & voice concerning all the different matters of life and shares what she has learned in hopes that others may encounter their breakthroughs and be encouraged in life’s toughest challenges…and in the following article she does just that. I think you will enjoy her thoughts and relate to her.  Check out her blog at Nikkigeorge.com to read other great articles written by her.
 
by Nikki George
“I’ve come up against a few obstacles in parenting… My two oldest, especially lately, are often in competition with one another or for another sibling.. There’s been much whining, complaining, negativity, different sides of the story, bickering and on most days I feel like a constant referee..
On some occasions I find myself letting them problem-solve and other days asking them why they didn’t come to me.
My goal in raising children is that they would respect, honor and love one another, but most of the time I feel like we are striving to stay above the waves. I feel the weight of the world on my shoulders as not only do I feel worn out physically, as the constant demands from day to day can be enough in itself.. (preparing meals, a wife, laundry, dishes, grocery shopping, running other errands) doing my best to keep the kids from running down the aisles, fighting over who gets what seat, and looking for creative ways to keep them on their best behavior until we get out of the store, lol.
Emotionally, I feel that as a stay-at-home, homeschooling mom, everything falls into my lap. (which in turn blurs your vision into “I have to” versus “I get to”)
If they get a cavity, it’s my fault… If they are mean to each other, it’s my fault.. If I have to repeat myself more than once, it’s my fault… If they don’t know something that they should know by their age, it’s my fault.. THE LIST CAN GO ON!
And yes, in some sense it IS our responsibility… but it goes deeper than that.
And all of those things are just what we see. What about teaching them the inside things like, character, forgiveness, problem solving, processing of thoughts, heart issues, and so much more? And then what about the emotional side of things… Am I filling their love tanks? Discerning whether to love or discipline in that moment, Did I respond in godly character as an example for this situation in front of them? Then you take into consideration teaching them the spiritual side of everything as well… Praying for them when they are hurting or sick. Bringing God into their lives in a way that they can understand. I’m raising Little Disciples My job is a BIG DEAL!… Not something to be taken lightly. ALL MY RESPONSIBILITY!!!
I began to feed into this lie.
This condemnation from the enemy that I’m not enough, I’m not doing enough and that I will never be enough. (I began to hear it not only as a mother but as a wife and friend) And then I ask myself, where in the world did my JOY go?
So this year I have asked God to increase my authority in the home. I figured I can’t force change, humility, heart or attitude changes so maybe if I could get a handle on this authority thing then I could really get some breakthrough… And while I am definitely attaining authority and some breakthrough in areas that I never had before, it still was not the key. At times I have felt so overwhelmed, drained and exhausted, and through an honest self check didn’t even want to be around myself.
I am so completely and always have been VERY GRATEFUL for every day of life with my children because I know how precious and short life is but on some days just wanted to run and hide… I don’t reach out for help often but out of desperation I contacted a few friends for prayer.
Later that night I went to the YMCA and ran into the answer of those prayers. There was another mom there and we got to talking about the different things going on and she asked me, ‘How are you praying for your kids?’ I proceeded to tell her that I go in prayer about the specific problem and that I’ve also been taking authority when I see the enemy surrounding our situation.. BUT HAD NO IDEA I WASN’T BEING PROACTIVE IN PRAYING FOR THEM! I realized I felt selfish in going into time with the Lord and spending a good portion of it praying about my kids. My theory was that my attention after spending time with Him would be on them so this was OUR time JUST HIM AND I.
There have even been seasons that I have been proactive in praying for my marriage, and watched MIRACLES happen, but because my husband never gets a lot of my time, I didn’t feel guilty in praying for him. He was not going to be considered an ‘idol’ if I prayed for him.
Isn’t it funny how I thought I was doing everything right? WOW, LIES, LIES, LIES! Who better than the Creator of my children, to go to? The one who knit together everything He has placed inside of them. The One who knows their every need physically, emotionally, and spiritually. THE ONE who has GIVEN ME THE ASSIGNMENT to take care of them. He is the only one with the keys to unlock doors that have been locked for so long. And what a greater intimacy between the Lord and I, as I see prayers being answered that go beyond even the spoken ones! WOW!
Update- I’m still getting time in with the Lord but I’ve added just a little more time to get specific in proactively praying for my children and husband every morning too. Throughout the day as problems and situations arise I lift those up too.
I am in the very beginning of this new journey and finding that my role as a mother is not necessarily simple now but I no longer carry the burdens and fears that once weighed me down.
I am getting ready to witness MIRACLES and REST in a way that I have never known before!
My joy will be restored in knowing the truth and I’m pressing foward with a new hope.
Lord do a mighty work inside of me and my children.
Soften and change our hearts in a way that only you can.
Turn the Impossibles into possible.
Show me which parts are mine as a mother and which parts are yours.
Continually remind me that my job is not to FIX/CONTROL CIRCUMSTANCES AND THINGS THAT ARE BEYOND MY CONTROL but to simply pray/lay them down at your feet in every detail, trusting that you’ve got this!”

Written by angela adkins

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